Archive | May, 2015

8 Weird Pride and Prejudice Things You Can Buy

26 May

I don’t know if you are aware but Pride and Prejudice is pretty popular, and its popularity has lead to a lot of merchandising.  I did a lot of scouring on Amazon and Etsy and most of the stuff I could find was actually pretty cool.  There are a lot of phone covers, posters, clothes, and other things with some real elegant designs.  However, there is also a lot of weird stuff out there too.

1) Jane Austen Bandages

Jane Austen BandagesYou can get these on amazon for $6.91 and free prime shipping!

2) Pride and Prejudice Gun Safe

Pride and Prejudice Gun Safe

This gun safe hidden in a copy of Pride and Prejudice is available on amazon for $29.99.  However if guns aren’t your thing you can buy thing Pride and Prejudice weed box instead.

Pride and Prejudice Weed Box 2

3) Pride and Prejudice Video Game

Matches and Matrimony Game

Take the starring role in Jane Austen’s most popular novels as you become one of the Bennet sisters in search of a husband. Will you pursue Mr. Bingley, whose good nature has already endeared him to your sister, or perhaps Mr. Darcy, the famous protagonist from Pride and Prejudice? The narrative of Matches & Matrimony comes from the combining of 3 different novels, allowing you to create new storylines from Miss Austen’s most famous works! As you play you, will pick your daily routine to improve your characteristics, and then select your own path through the intersecting stories. With 9 different endings to be discovered, Matches & Matrimony can be played again and again as you create your own tale of classic romance.

  • 9 Different endings!
  • Hours of replayability!
  • 6 suitors to pursue!
  • 3 Novels in one game!
  • Thoughtful and Provocative gameplay!

It’s available on PC and Mac for $6.99

 

4) Jane Austen Action Figure

Jane Austen Action Figure

The Jane Austen Action figure comes with her own Quill and copy of Pride and Prejudice! Available for $11.29 on amazon.

5) Longbourn Tea

Longbourn Tea

It’s not that I think that it is weird they made a Pride and Prejudice Tea, its that they made it Longbourn.  If you are going to name a tea after a house in Pride and Prejudice you got to name it after Pemberley, am I right?  Well this tea is available on Amazon for the cool price of $14.95.

6) Mrs. Darcy Baby Bib

Mrs. Darcy

When it is to early to dream about being a future Mrs. Darcy? I would say if you are still wearing diapers its a little too early.  This bib and various other “I Love Darcy” bibs are available on amazon for $9.99.

7) Pemberley Soy Candle

Pemberly Soy Candle

You can make your house smell like Pemberley, but I wouldn’t count on Mr. Darcy knocking on your door to insult and propose to you.  Available on Etsy for $10.00.

8) Jane Austen Toothpaste

Jane Austen Toothpaste

After I found the bandages I thought to myself surely it’s not going to get weirder than this.  I was wrong.  You can get your very own tube of Jane Austen toothpaste for $6.15 on Amazon.

Advertisements

Pride and Prejudice Episode VI: The Half Blood Prince

16 May

Pride and Prejudice 1995

We’ve made it to the end! It only took me almost two years to actually finish watching it but I have finally watched the entire 1995 Pride and Prejudice BBC mini-series.  It’s been a long journey, there have been two Fast and Furious movies, and at least 5 seasons of The Voice.  Anyway now that I am back on track I’m going to continue to write something every week.

We pick up in this episode where the last ended, with Mr. Wickham agreeing to marry Lydia for an unknown sum of money (presumed to be paid by Mr. Gardinder).  Mrs. Bennet has entirely forgiven/forgotten any transgressions and is ecstatic.  Every one else in the family, not so much.  Wickham and Lydia come back to Longbourn and Wickham tries his best to lay the charm on everyone but Lizzy is not having it.  She subtly lets Mr. Wickham know that she knows about him and his past and does not approve.  Lydia manages to be a huge cunt and piss off everyone.  It really is as if she ran away and got married simply to rub it in all her sisters faces.

Mr. Bingley returns to Netherfield!  All the Bennet ladies are pretty stoked even though Jane tries to play it off that she doesn’t really care.  We see a cool scene with Mr. Darcy telling Mr. Bingley that he kept it from him that while he was in London Jane was also there.  Bingley is mad but gets Mr. Darcy’s blessing in him pursuing Jane.  Mr. Bingley immediately goes to see Jane and Miss Bennet slowly makes the daughters leave so they can be alone.  Lizzy and Kitty are excited, Mary gives zero fucks.

Part 6 - Mary Zero Fucks

Next we get a surprise visit from Lady Catherine De Bourgh to Longbourn.  We have seen Lady Catherine being terrible before but this is truly her shinning moment.  She begins by insulting Mrs. Bennet and everyone in the house and asks Lizzy to take a walk with her.  On their walk we find out the actual reason for her visit.  Unknown to Lizzy she had been told that Mr. Darcy was to propose to Lizzy.  Lady Catherine wanted to confirm and shut this down.  Now it wouldn’t be Lady Catherine if she hadn’t done this in the most insulting and demeaning fashion possible.  Seeing as Lady Catherine is being the biggest bitch imaginable Lizzy toys with her a bit before finally admitting that she is not actually engaged with Mr. Darcy.  When Lady Catherine tries to make her promise to reject any proposal that Mr. Darcy might make in the future Lizzy refuses.

Part 6 - Picture 2

Lizzy has her most gangsta moment her and tells her “You have insulted me in every possible way, and can now have nothing further to say.”  aka, bitch be gone.  Lady Catherine has a huge hissy fit and leaves.  Apparently she brought her daughter along with her who looks like she is going to die at any moment.

Part 6 - Picture 3

After this Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy make a surprise visit to Longbourn and decide to take a walk into town.  Mr. Darcy makes one last attempt to Lizzy and asks if her feelings are the same as they were or if they have changed, if they have changed he will not bother her again.  Lizzy confesses they have and that she loves him!  They become engaged and Mr. Darcy gets Mr. Bennet’s permission.  Mr. Bennet is concerned since he believes Lizzy hates him but Lizzy assures him she is in love with Mr. Darcy.

Part 6 - Double Wedding

Also in attendance to the wedding is Mr. Bingley’s sister who’s resting bitch face is amazing.

Part 6 - Resting Bitch Face

Every one is in attendance of the wedding with the only exception being Lydia and Mr. Wickham and Lady Catherine and her deathly daughter.

Thoughts

Mrs. Bennet’s ability to forget what just happened is pretty amazing.  Mrs. Bennet goes from Lydia being the worst and ruining the entire family to her being the model daughter.  Mr. Bennet at least is still pissed and although the drama is over, will likely hate Mr. Wickham for the rest of his life.

Lydia is the worst.  She has at no point learned from her mistake or what the effect of her actions could have had on her sisters.  She not only doesn’t feel bad but is actively bragging and boasting about her marriage to all her sisters.  It seems like her only goal in her entire marriage was to rub it in her sisters face.

Lady Catherine is amazing in her ability to be a cunt to everyone.  I don’t think she has the ability to feel empathy for anyone but her self.  The wedding scene was pretty satisfying when it showed a shot of every one in attendance and then cut to Lady Catherine and her daughter alone in Rosenings, where the pair will assumedly die alone.

Part 6 - Picture 6

In the end I liked a lot of things about this version of Pride and Prejudice.  Being that it is 5-6 hours long as you would guess they don’t leave anything out.  They also include a lot of other moments that weren’t in the book or in the 2005 film version.  I liked the thoroughness and I liked seeing things through some of the other character’s perspective.  I think that the performance of Lady Catherine and Mr. Collins was the best I’ve seen so far.  I felt that the performance of Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy was great but not as good as the 2005 Film.  If you are a big Pride and Prejudice fan this mini series is for you, and likely you have already seen it.  If you so-so fan then you might want to avoid this version.  It is very long and honestly the story of Pride and Prejudice just doesn’t require 6 hours of material.

There were really some stand out moments but overall it felt more like a chore to watch the entire series than it was sometime I really got into.  If you want to watch it the entire series is available now on Amazon Prime for members, however it is no longer available on Netflix streaming.

Drinking Game

  • When Mrs. Bennett is terrible and ungrateful
  • Whenever Lydia is a cunt
  • Anyone plays a piano
  • Mrs. Bennet mentions the Collins
  • Every time Mrs. Bennett Winks
  • Lady Catherine is a cunt
  • Miss Bingley’s Resting Bitch Face
  • When they say fornication and cut to Lydia during the wedding
  • Pour one out when you see Lady Catherine and her Daughter die alone at the end

Pride and Prejudice Episode V: Fast Five

10 May

Pride and Prejudice 1995

This episode starts with the meeting of Lizzy and Georgiana Darcy.  Mr. Darcy’s feelings come out through this meeting as Georgiana is unaware of any of the arguing or awkwardness between them.  She only knows of Lizzy what her brother has told her and it is clear he speaks of her in nothing but the highest regards.  Lizzy adores Georgiana and once again gets a view of the life she could have had with Darcy if she had married him.  A weird thing during both meetings between Lizzy and Georgiana is that they are basically wearing the same outfit both times.  I don’t know if this is on purpose or if there just wasn’t that many options back in the day.

Part 5 - Same Dress Collage

During their second meeting after Lizzy leaves Miss Bingley starts talking mad shit about Lizzy and tries to get Mr. Darcy to join in.  Mr. Darcy has none of this and says that Lizzy is one of the most handsome women he’s ever set his eyes on.

Part 5 - Miss Bingley's Resting Bitch Face Skitch

Lizzy then gets a letter that Lydia has took off with Mr. Wickham and set to scandalize the entire family.  Mr. Darcy happens to come by right after she hears the news which Lizzy tells him and is very distressed.  Darcy assumedly goes off to go find him and see if he can help but Lizzy takes this to mean he is disgusted with her and her entire family and that her chances with Darcy are now completely over.

Lizzy goes back home and suggests to Jane that Lydia’s behavior isn’t only going to hurt them going forward but was the cause of her relationship with Mr. Bingley drying up.  Mr. Bennet later comes home after trying to find Lydia in London with no luck.  What they know now is that she is with Wickham and the two are unmarried and presumably have no real plans to actually marry.

Mr. Collins comes to the house after hearing the news.  When Kitty sees him she takes off wanting nothing to do with him and later on is watching from the window which was hilarious.  This Mr. Collins scene could very well be the greatest moment in the entire series.  He manages to insult them to such a level that at one point I started to think it was art.

Part 5 - Photobomb Kitty Skitch

Lizzy finally suggest that since they are so ruined and terrible that Mr. Collins should probably leave as to not tarnish his own reputation.  He agrees and is thankful for her concern of his reputation and takes off.  Next we get a letter from Lizzy’s aunt and uncle that Mr. Wickham will marry Lydia for a portion of her inheritance when he dies and a small yearly sum.  Mr. Bennet knows that his brother must have paid a lot of money to make such terms possible.  We know who the real savior was but we don’t find out until part 6.

Thoughts

In the book and other versions so far Mr. Bennet has been a real bitch.  He still doesn’t know what to do and often uses humor to defuse serious situations.  In this adaptation however we got to see a side of him I had never seen before.  Once he gets home without Lydia he is determined to do better and prevent his other daughters from making the same mistake.  He apologizes to Lizzy for not listening to her and he accepts responsibility of letting Lydia go while knowing how uncontrollable she is.  I thought this was cool and it was good to see a version of Mr. Bennet that actually learns something.

Since her engagement confrontation with Darcy Lizzy is now fully aware of what others think of her family and is trying to stop them from destroying them selves.  Her awareness though could cause a lot of strife between Jane and her sisters if she’s too caviler about this.  When Jane comes to talk to her about what she meant when she said that Lydia’s behavior is causing much more damage than she is seeing she quickly covers up and deflects the question.  I think this was good of her and that Jane knowing that her chance with Mr. Bingley was ruined by her sister would only cause Jane more pain and anger.

Lydia, Lydia, Lydia.  Lizzy is only a few years older than Lydia but there is an ocean of common sense that separates the two.  Lydia naivety that Mr. Wickham’s intentions are pure is amazing.  She doesn’t even consider that something could be wrong or that the effect of her actions could have on her other sisters.  She just wants to go out and about with her shiny new beau and doesn’t once stop to think that it is odd that he won’t let her go out side or stand too close to the windows.

Drinking Game

Part 5 - Ghost Darcy 2 Skitch

  • When Miss Bingley is a bitch
  • Mention of nerves
  • When Lizzy say’s “I shall never see him again”
  • When Mr. Darcy has none of Miss Bingley’s shit and walks out
  • Ghost Darcy
  • Lady Catherine is mentioned
  • When Mrs. Bennet hits her Smelling Salts

Pride and Prejudice Episode IV: Age of Extinction

3 May

Pride and Prejudice 1995

Episode four picks up right where episode three ends with the aftermath of the Darcy proposal to Elizabeth.  Mr. Darcy immediately writes Lizzy a letter to better explain the Mr. Wickham situation.  He gives her the real down low on what is going on and let’s her know that Mr. Wickham is really the turd and that he tried to sneak marry Mr. Darcy’s 15 year old younger sister.  Mr. Darcy acknowledges his role in preventing the marriage between Mr. Bingley and Jane and again says he does not feel sorry for doing so.  While reading the letter Lizzy takes a second and realizes that her family has in fact acted a real fool and though his flippant attitude toward preventing the engagement is shitty, it is justified.  Mr. Darcy does apologizes for one thing in this instance and that is preventing Mr. Bingley from knowing that Jane was in town when she was in London.  He realizes this was a dick move but what’s done is done.

After reading the letter Lizzie has a change of heart toward Mr. Darcy and starts to think maybe he wasn’t that bad after all.

The Bennet’s, still at Roesings, pack up and head back home.  There is a blonde girl that is with them that I didn’t recognize and have no idea who she is.  She is at lunch with Lizzie and her sisters after Lizzy gets back home and then never seen from again.  It was weird.

Episode 4 - Blonde Chick

Back home Lydia is super pissed about not getting to go to Bathing to see the officers.  Mr. Bennet shuts her down with a level of giving zero fucks that is truly epic.  However Lydia gets an invite from one of their family friends so she gets to go anyway.  Before she does Lizzy, with her new knowledge of how tacky their family looks, warns Mr. Bennet that Lydia needs to reign her shit in or she’s going to bring shame on the whole family.  Mr. Bennet agrees but lets Lydia go anyway without bringing it up to her.

Lizzie leaves again and goes with her Aunt and Uncle on a tour of the countryside and low and behold they happen to go right by Mr. Darcy’s home of Pemberly.  Lizzie gets a full tour of the house starts falling for Darcy and seeing what could have been hers in a life with Darcy.  Mr. Darcy is away and not expected to be home until the following day, but, comes home a day early!  Both him and Lizzy are surprised and have an awkward conversation but are generally quite nice to each other.  Lizzy’s Aunt and Uncle are impressed by how nice he is and Mr. Darcy convinces Lizzy to meet his little sister who will be in town the following day.

Thoughts

Lydia wants the D!  She is super boy crazy and there is a lot of foreshadowing of what is to come in the next episode between her and Wickham.  Lizzy has a conversation with Jane about Wickham’s true nature in which they decide not to tell anyone.  This along with the conversation she has with Mr. Bennet about reigning in her boy craziness are times when they could have warned Lydia but didn’t.

It kind of sucks that really when Lizzy falls in love with Darcy is when she visits his home and sees how rich he is.  I know she really does feel for him but it really makes it looks like money is the deciding factor.

Ghost Darcy.  It happens.  It is awesome.

Episode 4 - Ghost Darcy

Mr. Collins is as creepy and weird as ever.

Episode 4 - Hey Girl Hey

Lastly, I think it’s weird they get to just tour Mr. Darcy’s house while he is away.  Maybe that was a chill thing to do in the day but it seemed odd to me.

Drinking Game

  • Every time Mr. Collins is creepy
  • Every time Mr. Collins talking about how great Roseings is
  • When Ghost Darcy Appears
  • Every time Lydia says fawns over officers
  • When Mr. Darcy jumps in the water
  • When Pemberly’s Housekeeper compliments the Darcy’s
  • Every time Mr. Darcy asks about Lizzies Parents